Happy New Year

Well we are about to ring in 2012.  I don't know about you but I so am looking forward to a better year for us all.  Better economy, Better HEALTH, and much Prosperity for us all!

Many New Years we all make resolutions.  My hope is that you if you recently placed a baby/or child for adoption with a family.  That you will focus on the reasons that you placed that Lil Gift from God with a family.  In helping birth mothers through post-adoption it is very important that you nurture and embrace your selfless GREAT LOVE for that baby, to as why you placed in the first place.  Don't let your grief get out of control.  Or last for YEARS on end.  I placed my bdaughter 30 years ago.  I still have moments that I tear up and cry.  I think that is the MOTHER in me.  Now I think they are HAPPY tears.  Tears of blessings!  That I was blessed to be chosen to be her birth mother.  God will never give you more than you can handle. 

Ways to get through grief-  Journal!  Journal! Journal!  Get those deep emotions out of your body and on to paper! Even if they sound crazy, even if they are full of anger, What ever the emotion JOURNAL it!  My belief is you can not heal by going around something.  You must dig deep and go to the dark part of the pain - through it and to the other side.  To see the the LIGHT that awaits you.  That light was my Jesus!  He walked with me, I never was alone.  I am never alone today.

Scrapbook- Make a scrapbook of the birth, all that pertains to the adoption.  Hopefully you had an open adoption.

Use all Available resources- If you find that you get seriously depressed seek medical professional treatment immediately.  Severe Depression, suicidal ideation.  There are many online wonderful birth mother support groups

Birthmom Buds

Sunflower Group

WWW.Birthmothersunite.com  Contact: Lucy Frankin, CPAC at

birthmothers@aol.com 

For a confidential free consultation for counseling. 

1-888-803-4956  She is trained to work with Birth Mothers Trauma / Post-Placement - Anxiety, Depression, Reunion, Healing.

Adopted Man Gets Box Of Christmas Joy From Birth Mother - Kansas City News Story - KMBC Kansas City

Adopted Man Gets Box Of Christmas Joy From Birth Mother - Kansas City News Story - KMBC Kansas City

Awesome story, Get out the kleenex's. :)

I did not put a new ornament on my tree every year as this precious birth mother did. But I did have one from the first year, that I still put up to this day.  It had her orginal birth name on it and birth date. It makes us feel whole and complete to have her on our family Christ-mas Tree.  I have been reunited with my birthdaughter for 11 years.  I feel very blessed that God answered my prayers with in 18 1/2 years of my placing her with a family.  Never under estimate his timing.  I thank him everyday for this precious LIFE that I was the vehicle to carry her for her now family. 

Dwell NOT ON THE PAST

With God All Things are Possible! Post- Adoption - Lucy Franklin, CPAC

I can remember like it was yesterday.  The emotions that I felt.  The bottomless pit.  The emptiness inside. The roller coaster daily I road of depression/ anxiety/ second guessing my decision to place my daughter with a family for adoption.  My heart was bleeding tears so loud that could not be heard, For out of love to my family and those that did not understand my sacrifice.  I bled eternal for the love of my "LIFE"  this Child that I bore for another.

What got me through the hardest part of this process was my strong Faith in Christ Jesus.  His promise Matthew 19:26  Jesus looked at them intently and said, “Humanly speaking, it is impossible. But with God everything is possible.”

Once I got that scripture securely in my heart, soul, and mind.  I knew with out a shadow of a doubt.  That I would be okay, and most of all this "Child that I did bore for another Mother and family."  Was doing well,  this scripture proved true then, Also when she and I reunited in July of 2000.  It stands true today.  For she and I are both Christians.  He answered my plea and prayer for her and I to reunite.  We did, and are still in reunion.  She is my Blessing.  She I don't think even realizes the impact she has had on my "LIFE" she is my STRENGTH,  as is CHRIST JESUS! 

The stages of grief you will go through are the following:

Shock and Denial

Sorrow and Depression

Anger

Guilt

Acceptance

The steps to resolving your loss.  Is acknowledging the loss. 

If you just recently placed your baby for adoption.  If you are hurting.  Need help and support, or resources for healing your pain from post-adoption placement.  Visit http://www.birthmothersunite.com/ or contact us at 1-888-803-4956



Jesus Is the Reason for the Season

Merry Christmas from all of us at BMUBirthMothersUnite Blog and

www.birthmothersunite.com

ONE DAY AT A TIME

Explaining My Absence

Sorry I've been away for the past 7 weeks.  I had to have my left knee replaced.  It has been a long painful journey.  But I am very thankful for all my family and friends and MOST of ALL my HUSBAND for being a great caretaker!!!

Please keep me in your prayers.  As soon as I get stronger I will be back with more resources and blogs, on Adoption, Birthmothers, BirthParents. 

Happy Holiday's to you and YOUR'S.  Count your blessings everyday.  I have found that in Life when I am my lowest or think that I am, That God quickly reminds me of how much he LOVES me and HOW much he is right there beside me.  I have also found that LESS in life is MORE.  If I have quality relationships filled with LOVE, Respect, and most of all Christ Jesus.  Then I am very RICH.  A kind of Richness that I value more than MONEY. I am complete as long as I have my relationships in order with Christ, and Family and friends. 

Merry Christmas 

No One Else Knows - Bldg 429

The Past

(¯`♥´¯) .♥.•*¨`* ♥.•
´*.¸.•´♥"STOP living in the PAST....LEARN from  It....ANALYZE your PRESENT & FOCUS on your FUTURE!!!!!!" I BELIEVE ....that our Background and Circumstances may have Influence who we are but we are RESPONSIBLE for Who we BECOME....♥

Quote: Mother Theresa - Spread LOVE



"Spread love everywhere you go: First of all in your own house...let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God's kindness; kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile."~Mother Teresa

I'll Be Happy When?

I'll be HAPPY WHEN?  Does this question pop into your mind often?  I will be the first to say I have had this one coming out of my mind and mouth often through out my 52 years of life.  As a teen I couldn't wait to be GROWN and married.  I did marry at the tender age of nineteen and that marriage ended quickly in divorce, All because of I'll be HAPPY WHEN!  That was when I was not suppose to have married.  I did not have the maturity to have taken on a marriage, Household and all the other responsibilities that come with being married and responsible at nineteen.  So there went my I'll be HAPPY WHEN right to divorce court at the age of twenty-one.  You know now looking back I was living my life LOST, Flying through as my Mother would say on my skirt tale, Or as my Father would say I lived my life to the beat of my OWN DRUM.  I FEARED NOTHING, Thought I was HAPPY, Even when I was chasing I'll be HAPPY WHEN!  No longer than separating from my hubby I was on the hunt for the NEXT LOVE to fill the void.  I'll be HAPPY WHEN!  That was my MOTTO.  Then in denial about my life and searching for LOVE, I am hit with an unplanned pregnancy.  Unplanned by me, But PLANNED by GOD!  No I am not some religious NUT.  I am not religious, I have this magnificent relationship with Jesus Christ my Lord and Savior.  He was going to rescue me through this pregnancy.  He knows how to get our attention.  He had mine FAST!  All the ugly stopped immediately when I found out that I was carrying my "PRECIOUS" as I called her.  Then My I'll Be Happy WHEN changed into a beautiful selfless focus.  Off of me and on to she.  I just felt all along that I was having a girl, and I did!  I focused on taking excellent prenatal care of myself.  The I'll be Happy when left my mind completely.  My confident through out the pregnancy was my immediate family and JESUS CHRIST!  I talked often to him day and night.  To give me the strength to make the best decision for my "Precious".  The answer to this came in my sixth month of pregnancy.  By staying in constant relationship with Jesus on a personal level.  He guided me and gave me straight from his word - Lucy for when you are WEAK I am STRONG.  That was my portion daily that is my portion to this day.  For when I am weak, MY JESUS IS FOREVER STRONG!  He lives in ME, he guides me to make RIGHT decisions.  I did listen to my Jesus, and made an adoption plan and placed my "PRECIOUS" with a FAMILY in 1981.  Born unto me this CHILD I BORE for ANOTHER MOTHER.  This child that I adored then and today.  I know longer say I'll be HAPPY WHEN?  For "HAPPY" is something you chase, Happy is just a feeling that cannot be achieved without disappointment.  What I am now is Content.  I am content rather my portion is MUCH or Small.  My peace does not come from this world, My peace comes from KNOWING that I am LOVED by my Creator - As God the Father, The Son and the Holy Ghost.

So When are you going to be HAPPY???  You don't have to wait for WHEN, You can have it all NOW! Everyday!  Seek the TRUTH, You shall find.  It's all in his word, The Holy Bible.

Right this very minute I am going through a TRIAL - The I'll Be Happy When's started!  I am facing TKR in both Knee's.  I am in constant extreme pain daily.  It wore me down emotionally and physically.  I was trying to get through it ON MY OWN!  I'd pray when I felt like it, but most often I was too worn down to pray.  So just like 30 years ago when I was in the unplanned, this severe osteo-arthritis bone on bone KNEEZLE problem as I call it broke me to go straight to the MIGHTY PHYSICIAN!  I began to pray, I spent all Sunday in constant communication with the MIGHTY PHYSICIAN Jesus Christ.  I had to lay it on the LINE, Repentance was first, I spewed it all out.  He knew, He already knew!  Because he KNOWS all and SEE's ALL.  Don't ever think for one minute that he doesn't.  He is just waiting for you to have enough faith and courage to bring it all to him, then TRUST.  My first surgery is planned for Oct. 17th.  I'll keep all updated.  I ask that you join me in this journey in prayer for my complete and quick recover.  I ask that if you have a NEED that you post that need here in the comments section.  We will join together in prayer, One for another!  He's listening.  He LOVES us unconditionally!  HE CARES, No When's about it!  He always CARES for his children!!!

    To pray is nothing more involved than to open the door, giving Jesus access to our needs and permitting "HIM" to exercise HIS own power in dealing with them.   O Hallesby

That God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ.
1 Peter 4:11

Thinking Adoption?



I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the
truth. 3 John 1:4 (NIV)

 

When I placed my daughter 30 years ago with a family.  My biggest request and demand.  Was the adoptive parents be CHRISTIANS.  That they live a Christian life.  Know Christ as their LORD and Savior.  That they also instill CHRISTIANITY in this Life that God created, That he allowed me to carry especially for them.  Even though it was a closed adoption.  Not what I would have liked, but that's all they had back in 1981 when I placed.  I am very thankful that the Agency I chose indeed honored me with that request.  She has had most of what I desired for her.  Not every placement will be perfect.  I can say for sure she has had a strong loving Christian MOTHER that has been through thick and thin with her children.  I admire her and I am thankful to this day for her.  I know my daughter loves her for she is the only mother she ever had.  A lot of Birth Mothers would be upset to hear this.  This doesn't upset me.  She has told me herself how much she LOVES her and how bonded they are.  This makes me very complete and happy.  Because then when I reflect on the choice so difficult to have made those thirty years ago.  It was the right choice,  I didn't make the choice on my own.  I sought God's guidance through out my pregnancy.  I wanted her well provided for.  A responsible birth mother will go the extra mile through out her pregnancy to make an adoption plan. Remember do not make the decision with your heart your heart will tell you to RUN with your baby.  You need to make it with a sound mind.  If you are in a crisis pregnancy find a CPC- Pregnancy Resources Center in your city.  Also you can call 1-800-395-HELP 24 x 7.  They will direct you to a CPC in your city also.    Successful adoption plans today are those that are honored through out by the triad. Meaning the triad works lovingly together for the best interest of the child. 

 

 

Faith

Thankfulness

Our Pastor spoke on GRUMBLING today, and THANKFULNESS!  I think I am going to work harder in that area.  Because God has provided for me, UP and over  MORE than I truly deserve.  I am not homeless, I never mess a meal.  I have a husband that does LOVE all me and my many personalities.  God wants US HUNGRY for him in a way that we FORGET this temporal LIFE.  See he Chose us at our creation in our Mothers WOMB,  He has his eye on us from that very day of conception till the last breathe we take in this life.  We ARE CHOSEN, It saddens him when those with free will, that hear the GOSPEL that know the truth but choose the secular WORLD  over the ALMIGHTY.  But he never gives up on us till that last breathe if you accept him you shall have eternal life.  My heart hurts for anyone that never gets the simple MESSAGE, For those that twist it and try to mold it into something different than what the scripture says: John 3:16 says it all!  I don't care about man made religion or what the world has made CHURCH into. The BIG EXPENSIVE HIGH TECH FEEL GOOD Church's!  It's NOT about us folks - Not about that little hour you spend there at Church.  Yes he is pleased you came, IT's about Relationship, Relationship, Relationship with Jesus. A Daily Hunger for him that you are transformed.  Just as the scripture speaks of, Once you receive Christ, He lives inside of you.  You become Christ LIKE.  NOT HAUGHTY, But HUMBLE, NOT BOASTFUL but meek and I am a lowly sinner, that seek those that are lost as I once was, He wants you to KNOW HIM. Churches need to focus on relationship with CHRIST and being humble and LOVING all people rather they are Christians or NOT.  For God will have the final say in all things!  I will never be perfect, But in his site I am BEAUTIFUL, I am the Kings Daughter!  I am ROYALTY.  Tears well up in my eyes.  When I think of all the ugly that I have committed in sin.  When I was lost and worldly.  But he never left my side.  I truly always felt his presence in my darkest hours.  Even when I felt that I couldn't do better, I KNEW without a doubt My Mighty God could!  Oh yeah, If you think you can't, Turn it over to God.  You don't have to beg, plead or ask over and over for the same prayer to be heard.  Just tell him!  Praise him! Then when he delivers his answer in his timing. REJOICE! Have FAITH, because some things I have asked for took YEARS to be answered.  But they were answered.  In his timing!  Trust the Master with your LIFE.  Always know that when you think God is not NEAR,  It's when he is the NEAREST!  Because he wants you to Trust and SEEK him DAILY.  Where are you in your relationship with Christ Jesus?  Go talk with him now about it all.  He is patiently waiting.



Ain't That Love - Adoptee Singing to BirthMother

God's Grace

BirthMom Buds Blog: Blog Button

BirthMom Buds Blog: Blog Button

Reunion- Adoptee Birthmother reunite w/ Adoptive parents help

http://www.facinglife.tv/episode/season_5/episode_3/episode_503_video_full.htm

Delivery Chosen

A Mothers Love - By Lucy Franklin



Today is the day that My MOTHER went to her eternal home 3 years ago in 2008.  I was blessed to have her for 49 years.  Thankful very much to God Almighty for that blessing.  Today I rejoice that she has a new body and no longer suffers. But apart of me today is sad, and very much lonely for her.  She was MY biggest cheerleader, She was one of those SUPER MOMS.  I envy her strength to this day.  One thing I could always count on about my Mother was she had a sweetness about her, Even when she had the most trouble out of me through my teen years.  She never gave up on me.  She had a relationship so strong with Jesus that she knew how to speak to me with out JUDGEMENT.  She spoke the truth with LOVE and Mercy in her precious eyes.  She never failed me. The LOVE she had for myself and two siblings was a love so pure and equal.   I could actually see Jesus's eyes through hers.  That's how much she lived the TRUE CHRISTIAN LIFE.  She was the most humble woman I have ever met.  Always put others before herself.  Not as a mortar, But as she looks down from Heaven above.  I pray that I make her proud. Of the woman she molded me into be.  As parents we have a responsibility to be our children's parents first.  Then their friends.  We must keep them safe and protect them from the evils of the world.  Today as I reflect on my longing and missing her.  I am going to choose right now to do as she would want me to do.  Remove the sadness, and fill it with MY MOTHERS LOVE.  Then for the rest of the day I will reflect on all the memories that my mind does have of a woman MY MOTHER, that lived a full blessed life.  All given to her because she trusted, she believed in

John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

Her Faith stood on God's promise of John 3:16. 

As a birthmom I also stand on that promise.  To someday have eternal life with my bdaughter.  For someday that she shall truly know my heart and my great LOVE for her.  More than the words that she has heard me say since being reunited.  She shall SEE for her own eyes in paradise her FIRST MOTHERS LOVE forever!

A Birthmothers Prayer

Pride





As a Christian we are Never to be Prideful. James 4:6 Says it best: It's common knowledge that "God goes against the willful proud; God gives grace to the willing humble."  We are to be humble and walk in humility.  Many times I have heard someone say, Or even I have said I am a PROUD Birthmother.  There is nothing wrong with saying this, For when I am saying  that, I am truly saying I was  HONORED and Humble to be the one God selected to be the carrier and vehicle to deliver such a perfect precious child of GOD.  All our children, be they our birth children that we placed with a family, or reared children we are humble as Christians to be honored to be parents or a birth parent.  My point here is to be humble in your journey in LIFE.  We live in a world desperately searching for self-esteem, We live in a world of the Me, Me, Me, syndrome!  Are you ready for more change in your life?  Change? To change as a Christian means to convert, To be more "Christ" like.  I want God on my side.  What do you need to change in your life?  I walk humbly every day with My God.  You can also for as James 4:6 tells you! God gives grace to the willing humble!  Remember he takes you right were you are, bumps, bruises, stains, and ALL!  Daily communicate with your Lord and Savior, Watch him make you sparkle and shine.  Throw out all pride, flush, that down the drain so to speak.  I like to hang out with the LOWLY like Jesus. Because I want to share my testimony with them so they too can convert. Search your heart for any UGLY, reveal it to the man that KNOWS all that see's all!  Then watch a healing manifest in you like you have never seen before.  Then share with others what HE Jesus has done for you! 

 

Today's Inspirational - Aug. 21, 2011

Today's Inspirational -Aug 20th

H.O.P.E. - Healing Of Post-Adoption Effects - Workbook By Lucy Franklin C.P.A.C.

H.O.P.E. by Lucy Franklin C.P.A.C. |

Have you recently placed your baby for adoption?  Are you having difficulty moving forward in your life.  This workbook was written for YOU!  It is a Christian workbook.  That you can work at your own pace.  For a birthmother the decision to place will be the hardest decision and lifelong experience you will ever face.  But I being a reunited birthmother and also veteran birthmother can tell you that validating, Loving yourself, and with God's Loving Grace you can have an abundant life.  Your birth child wants what you wanted, You wanted the best for them and they surely want the best for you!

Click and review this little treasure of a workbook.  Today.  It doesn't matter when you placed this little book will be a blessing to you. 

Lucy Franklin, C.P.A.C.

Two Mothers

Your First Mother Gave you your beating heart,

Your Two Mother's Both LOVED you from the very START,

Your First Mother nourished you in utero, with tender loving care,

Your two Mothers have a bond in common that they both do share!

For it is YOU, That these two MOTHERS live for each and everyday,

Your First MOTHER & Now Mother lift you up to Jesus Daily as they do pray,

Your Now Mother is molding you with all that you will need,

Honoring the First Mother's wishes letting "Jesus take the lead".

Your First Mother's heart still beats strong with great LOVE for you,

Your Now Mother's heart still beats strong with great LOVE for you tooooooooo!

It was in God's plan for you to have TWO,

Two Mother's you were blessed with to see you Through,

In all that you do!

You might not even know that First Mother YET!

But I can BET!

That she has prayed daily with all her Might,

That someday you and she would reunite!

Yes, Your First Mother Gave you your beating heart,

A very good start!

Then the one you now call MOTHER took your First Mothers part,

It was God's plan from the Very Start.

For you to have Two Mothers you see,

And a LOVING FAMILY........

By

Aug. Book Spot Light- Jesus Calling- Sarah Young 365 Day Devotional

http://www.amazon.com/Jesus-Calling-Imitation-Leather-Sarah-Young/dp/B004VA0FXC/ref=sr_1_10?ie=UTF8&qid=1313777604&sr=8-10

Click the above link to purchase at http://www.amazon.com/

I have given this book as a gift to family and friends. I have been told that this little precious gift has restored them to Jesus and HEALED them physically, mentally, and most of all spiritually! A must read.  I start my day everyday with this LITTLE treasure!!! You will feel his presence LIKE NEVER BEFORE!!!!

Now what are you waiting for! Go get yours today!

Today's Inspirational - 1 Corinthians 13:12

Patience

Being a birth mom takes a lot of patience.  When I became one in 1981.  I was so young.  Didn't really know the impact of placing my bdaughter with a family would have on me.  Patience just was not my virtue. It's amazing now fast forward the journey I have had to get me to a place of understanding. 

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

The above Scripture is what has got me to my place of PATIENCE.  For God's LOVE has given me the strength to endure being what is often a hard thing to be a birth mom.  The First Mother.  That is often forgotten in the equation of the triad.  I have endured and with God I will continue to endure with PATIENCE and great LOVE in my HEART.  For this CHILD that I bore for another family. She is MY HEART! Will always be my HEART!

A quote I found: "Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can—working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!"
~Dieter F. Uchtdorf

To Him I seek DAILY for his word tells me:

Psalm 91

 ¹ Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
   will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

My Book- I Called Her Precious

Coming Soon - Poetry Book- For Birth Moms, Birth Parents, The Triad

I have been blessed with the gift to write poetry.  I am working right now with a collection of my favorites,  Putting them together to richly touch your hearts and help you in your journey in Adoption and LIFE in general.  This is a Christian poetry booklet.  I am just the one that stands in the GAP.  Because I truly know that when the SPIRIT comes upon me.  The words just flow.  All glory I give to OUR LORD and Savior.  Keep watching for I shall post the link for the pocket poetry book as soon as it's published!



Feeling DOWN?

Poetry Contest

http://bmubirthmothersunite.blogspot.com/2011/08/poetry-contest.html

Today's Inspirational - Aug. 16th

Crisis Pregnancy

My choices,

I could single parent this child of mine?

Or I could place him or her with an adopted family with parents a mother and father divine,

I could get an abortion the law says its okay?

Before you make that third decision,  I ask you to the Lord do now pray!

Pregnant, unmarried, What is a girl or woman to do?

The 3 choices given seem so few!

Ask Christ Jesus on bended knee,

Listen, Listen for his plea,

The Lord gave you Life years before,

And you and this baby he so very much now does adore!

He will give you the strength to make it through,

Even if the future looks bleak or blue to you,

It seems like a crisis more than you can bear,

But right now this minute he does hear your pain and prayer,

My child, My child trust in me,

For this child you now do carry you will see!

Was always always meant to be!

So deliver this child for me to adore,

And I will remember you in the book of life that this child for me you did bore!

1/27/2009 (C) Lucy Franklin

Jesus Love

Could you imagine your life with out ever being LOVED,

People are starving for Love, seeking it  in worldly things,

Some never look for the true source of unconditional love that is pure from Heaven ABOVE,

When you look in the wrong place for love, heartache it always does bring!

Jesus's Love,

Pure, Unconditional! As a Heavenly White Dove,

Many seek love in their job success, money, or fame,

Always chasing love but not finding their lives changing just staying the same!

They so desire for their hearts to mend and heal!

Their hearts always aching sorrow is all they do feel,

Jesus has known you even prior to your conception in your Mothers womb,

It was you he was thinking OF on the Blood Stained Cross and in even in his tomb,

You he thought of always from the very START, 

So please hear him as he speaks now unto your HEART,

I Jesus with great love for you will never depart!

Though at times in your earthly LIFE.

You will endure trials and great strife,

You will wonder why and cry out unto me,

With arms open wide as big as the universe there I will be!

Though you might can not see,

Faith will let you feel my presence while you receive MY GREAT LOVE for you on bended knee!

By His Grace!

His promised words and Great LOVE He says "Yes my child you shall too someday see MY Glorious FACE!

One day, In my timing, Until then just bask in MY EVERLASTING LOVING EMBRACE!

MY Love,

IS Pure, Is Unconditional!  Straight from God in Heaven ABOVE!!!